Nepali Rules of the Road

Hey everyone, this is Nick writing.  I was recently at the Guest House at the Tansen Mission Hospital, and saw this neat paper that I thought I’d share with you.  The paper is called “Rules of the Road: Indian Style”, but it would seem that these “rules of the road” are also followed in Nepal.  India and Nepal share many aspects of culture.  So I’ve typed up my own version of the paper, with few changes such as changing the word “India” to “Nepal”, and a few other small changes, to bring you my version of Nepali Rules of the Road.  Here it is:

Nepali Rules of the Road

Traveling on Nepali Roads is an almost hallucinatory position of sound, spectacle, and experience.  It is frequently heart-rending, sometimes hilarious, mostly exhilarating, always unforgettable – and, when you are on the roads, extremely dangerous. 

Most Nepali road users observe a version on the Highway Code based on a Sanskrit text.  These 12 rules of the Nepali road are published for the first time in English: 

• Article I:

The assumption of immortality is required for all road users. 

• Article II:

Nepali traffic, like Nepali society, is structured on a strict caste system.  The following precedence must be accorded at all times.  In descending order, give way to:

Cows, elephants, heavy trucks, buses, official cars, camels, light trucks, buffalo, jeeps, ox-carts, private cars, motorcycles, scooters, auto-rickshaws, pigs, pedal rickshaws, goats, bicycles (goods-carrying), handcarts, bicycles (passenger-carrying), dogs, pedestrians.  

• Article III:

All wheeled vehicles shall be driven in accordance with the maxim: to slow is to falter, to brake is to fail, to stop is defeat.  This is the Nepali drivers’ mantra.
 

•   Article IV:

Use of horn (also known as the sonic fender or aural amulet):

·         
                                      Cars (IV,1a-c)

1.      Short blasts (urgent) indicate supremacy, IE in clearing dogs, rickshaws, and pedestrians from path.

2.      Long blasts (desperate) denote supplication IE to oncoming truck: “I am going too fast to stop, so unless you slow down we shall both die”.  In extreme cases, this may be accompanied by flashing of headlights (frantic).

3.      Single blast (casual) means: “I have seen someone out of Nepal’s 32 million people whom I recognize”, or “There is a bird in the road (which at this speed could go through my windscreen)”, or “I have not blown my horn for several minutes.”

Trucks (IV,2,a):

    All horn signals have the same meaning, “I have an all-up weight of approximately 12.5 tons and have no intention of stopping, even if I could.”  This signal may be emphasized by the use of headlights.

Article IV remains subject to the provision of Order of Precedence in Article II above.

• Article V:

All maneuvers, use of horn, and evasive action shall be left until the last possible moment.

·        

• Article VI:

In the absence of seat belts (which there is), car occupants shall wear garlands of marigolds.  These should be kept fastened at all times.

·        

• Article VII:

Rights of way:  Traffic entering a road from the left has priority.  So has traffic from the right, and also traffic in the middle.

·      

• Article VIII:

Lane discipline:  All Nepali traffic at all times and irrespective of direction of travel shall occupy the center of the road.

·        

• Article IX:

Roundabouts:  Nepal has no roundabouts.  Apparent traffic islands in the middle of crossroads have no traffic management function.  Any other impression should be ignored. 

·        

• Article X:

Overtaking is mandatory.  Every moving vehicle is required to overtake every other moving vehicle, irrespective of whether it has just overtaken you.  Overtaking should be undertaken only in suitable conditions, such as in the face of oncoming traffic, on blind bends, at junctions, and in the middle of villages/city centers.  No more than two inches should be allowed between your vehicle and the one you are passing – one inch in the case of bicycles or pedestrians. 
  

·        

• Article XI:

Nirvana may be obtained through head-on crash.

·        

• Article XII:

Reversing:  No longer applicable since no vehicle in Nepal has the reverse gear.

I hope you all enjoyed this; it sure made me laugh, because it is so true!

Have a nice day, and be safe on the road.